


White Kisses

by minivanstop



Category: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton
Genre: Dallas lives, Everyone Is Alive, Fights, First Person, Fluff, Homophobic Slurs, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Johnny lives, Kissing, M/M, Modern Day, POV Third Person Limited, POV Third Person Omniscient, Sharing Body Heat, Sharing Clothes, Sharing a Bed, Short Chapters, Smoking, Snow, Swearing, Underage Drinking, Underage Smoking, third person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2017-02-22
Packaged: 2018-09-12 07:27:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9062389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minivanstop/pseuds/minivanstop
Summary: Modern day!!! basically Johnny is in the snow and Dally comes along and is like "no stop"





	1. In Which the Story Begins

**Author's Note:**

> I have a pattern planned for the POV's, so excuse the odd tags!! ^-^

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> all the characters are here!

**_Johnny_ **

 

     It was cold out, as it should be on any decent December day. The stores were populated by toys and colorful lights, playing merry Christmas songs. Christmas trees were displayed in view of the street from inside of houses. The snow was coming down lightly and with every step he took, it crunched pleasantly under Johnny’s feet. It was the perfect setting for lovers to enjoy, but Johnny couldn't. For one, he was completely alone, and secondly, he was freezing. After all, it was quite a few degrees below zero.

     His father was drunk out of his mind and has started slugging him before he blacked out, and his mother was yelling at his father. _“Outside is better than that stupid home,”_ He thought. _“Anythin’ is.”_ He shivered, suddenly wishing he has brought a jacket. The small boy shoved his hands into his jeans pockets, sniffling. He had decided to go to the Curtis’s place to warm up, and maybe eat, even though they lived quite a few blocks away. Another shiver passed over his body as he walked, following the paved road.

     “Johnny,” A deep gruff voice growled at him. Johnny yelped, jumping back.

     “O-Oh, uh, hey, man!”

     “Why're you out with no jacket in the snow?”

     Johnny lowered his gaze, shuffling his feet nervously. He began to stutter before he had noticed the near white-blonde frown. “Get in,” Dallas threw his head back, tossing his hair in the process. His words were ordered, as he recognized his posture. His distress was originating from his no good parents. “Let's get you warmed up, man.”

     “Thanks, Dal,” Johnny grinned shyly, taking the hand that Dallas offered.

     “Shut up.”

 

~❀❁❀~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since I have been MIA with posting chapter 6, I've made this chapter thicker. I hope this will be okay! I'll try to beef up the rest of the chapters once I am done with this 
> 
>  
> 
> man i hope y'all actually see this...


	2. In Which an Explanation is Given

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little later than before but hey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, chapters are to be short until later in the story :)) hey did you know it's really fun to try to write like a greaser? coz it is

**_Johnny_ **

 

     “So I left.” I explained softly as Dally dried my hair. “C’mon, man. That’s damn stupid of you,” Dally noted. I let out a sharp breath. That grumpy JD wasn’t taking my explanation. Aw hell, I wouldn’t myself. “This’ll the tenth time you’ve used that.” Dally tossed the towel aside and grabbed one of his shirts for me to wear. “Next time, you go straight here,” Dally growled softly.  He was pullin’ my shirt on. Even though I was seventeen already, and had been for months, he treated me like a child. I opened his mouth to snap at him, but glared instead. Dally smirked and let out a chuckle. It seemed to say, “Kid, you jump at your own shadow. Why’re you suddenly brave enough to glare at me, Dallas Winston?”  

     Dally stood up. I stood up afterwards, regrettin’ the fact I hadn’t asked for a belt. The pants I was borrowing were freakin’ huge on me, so I had to hold them with my hand. Then, this lanky beast walked to his sorry excuse of a kitchen and opened the equally sorry excuse of a fridge. “Hungry?” He asked. Before he could answer for himself, my darn stomach rumbled. My eyes widened. I swear, my body always makes things hard on me. Dally tossed me a half-eaten sandwich, which ended up smackin’ me. I couldn’t help it, and I yelped, fumbling to catch it. I cursed myself in my head for bein’ stupid, but man is it hard not to. The sandwich was stale, so chuckled nervously and took a few bites of the soggy thing. Dally lit a cigarette and took a long drag of it. “D-Dally?” I asked. “Can I stay the night?” The pause Dally left between us seemed dangerous.

“My parents are probably still f-fighting and-”

“Sure, man.”

“Really?” I didn’t mean to, but I squeaked it. Dally scowled.

“Shut up before I change my mind,”

I mean, we both knew he’d never kick me, his friend, outside to the snow overnight, but I still shut my trap. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~❀❁❀~

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once I've posted all of the chapters I have ready, I intend to post once weekly.


	3. In Which Dallas Steps in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they're playing Uno.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaa I'm trash at rising action I'm sorry

**_Dallas_ **

 

     He hated Johnny’s parents. They were brutal and unloving. Johnny was the opposite. Johnny Cade was the boy who hated all fighting, who was a lost puppy in desperate need of affection. Johnny Cade, who jumped into a burning church and barely escaped alive. His back was scarred, along with his temple and arms, and couldn’t run fast anymore. Dally angrily put a card down, making the dark puppy in front of him flinch. “Uno.” He growled. Johnny yelped at the fury radiating from the taller boy’s icy eyes that stared daggers to the ground. His Johnny Cade, who he was determined to protect.“Did I do something wrong?” Johnny inquired softly. Dallas realized that he had scared his pet, and relaxed. “Naw, man,” He said as  nonchalantly as he could manage. The fear left Johnny’s eyes slowly. The endless glistening pools adopted a different expression.

     “Don’t give me that face, Cade,” Dallas snapped at Johnny. The expression was one of  sympathy. “I don’t wanna have your damn pity. This ain't about my old man, so stop.” He grumbled. Johnny ‘s expression didn’t change, making Dally scowl. “You can tell me what’s wrong, Dal,” Johnny pressed softly while placing a card. Dally rolled his eyes, drawing four cards from the deck. “The wrong thing here ‘s how you’re making me draw four, man!”

 

~❀❁❀~

 


	4. In Which Dally Buys Cigarettes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dally is a salty child

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's not christmas time anymore, but i started writing this a while ago and never really got a chance to publish it until now ^-^ sorry!

**_Dallas_ **

 

_      Chink!  _ I never knew why he didn’t just run away forever. He would tell me he just wanted his parents’ love an’ shit but I give him plenty of mine. I mean, he  _ is  _ my pet ‘n’ all, but, I gave him more of my time than I’ve ever given any of the other boys.

_      “Here’s your change, sir,”  _

_      “Yeah, yeah,” _

     Johnny didn’t understand. His parents don’t care none about him, but they were all he ever wanted. When he was in the hospital, he even refused to let his mother see him. He was just so… so… so damn against his own words! I lit a cigarette, ‘n’ took a long drag. It cleared my mind, like how any good cancer stick should. One of these days, I’m gonna give Cade’s old man a damned shiner. He deserved it. Johnny was  _ my _ business, and anyone who messed with him, messed with me. 

     I hated kids, but man, Johnnycakes was the kid I was set on loving. I wonder, when will he notice? Should I do more than just gettin’ cigarettes for him or jumpin’ the soc’s who dared even lay a finger on  _ my  _ Johnny? He was mine, even if Pony tried to convince anyone he was the gang’s pet. It was obvious he felt safest around me ‘n’ Pony, so it was evident he belonged to one of us, and it was also obvious he liked me more. I hope, at least.

  
  


~❀❁❀~


	5. In Which Dallas Has a Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dally has a nightmare; johnny is there to comfort him

**_Johnny and Dallas_ **

 

_      Running. Running. Running. Where was he? Oh whatever, that didn’t matter. Running. Running. Running. Something was burning. Where was he? Something is on fire! Where is he? There was Ponyboy, sure, but where was Johnny? Oh, it’s black now. Where was Johnny? It was light again. Johnny was there. He looked sick. Why were there tubes going in and out of him? Oh god. He opened his mouth, saying something. He’s still. Oh no. Why was he so still?  _

     Dallas woke up with a cold sweat dripping down his back. His heart pounded. Was he panting? Probably. This was probably the fourth time this month. Dallas sighed loudly. The loud sigh stirred the smaller boy that was sleeping on the bench next to him.  _ He’s still alive. _ Dallas thought. Johnny got up, rubbing his eyes. “Dal…” He mumbled, walking over. The blonde scooted back, running his fingers through his pale hair. Johnny yawned, stretching his arms out. “Dally, man, you okay?” At this, Dallas scoffed. 

     “Hey don’t scoff at me, you’re the one who woke up panting and whiter than usual.” 

     No reply. 

     “Did you have a nightmare?” Johnny asked tentatively. Dally turned over. “Fuck off.” Johnny gently ran his thumb pad over Dallas’ features, tracing his jaw. The taller boy felt the urge to jerk away, but instead melted into his touch, relieved to have his warm (and thankfully still alive) hand on him. “I dreamed you were in the hospital again, ‘n’ that you were dyin’,” He started slowly. Johnny nodded, not taking his hand away. “It’s not the first one either, y’know.” He looked up, taking Johnny’s hand softly off of his face. Johnny sat next to him. 

     “Do you want me to stay here a lil bit longer?” 

      A hesitation 

     “Look, man, you can just say n-”

“Stay.” He shuffled awkwardly to make space for Johnny on the bed. “Please,” Johnny’s eyes widened briefly before they softened. Dally wanted him to stay, and Dallas Winston always got what he wanted. 

 

~❀❁❀~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whaaaaaat??? a long chapter????????? no way!11!!!111!!!11
> 
> jk its not even that long i cut it short but its longer than two paragraphs


	6. In Which Johnny is Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rising action for the next chapter!!

**_Johnny_ **

 

     Johnny had quite a fitful night. Granted, he always did. He’d wake up, pass out, and then wake up again, only to black out moments later. When Dallas had woken up from his nightmare, he woke Johnny up, too. About half an hour after they they had fallen asleep, Johnny woke up again. He remembered nothing from his dream, just that it was terrifying. Hasn’t Ponyboy mentioned something about these before?

Oh, what the hell. Dreams are weird.

     Well, he was awake now, and that was what was bothering him. He was exhausted, like usual. Dallas didn’t seem to notice he was awake again, and just continued sleeping, keeping one hand gently on Johnny’s back. The wind howled, rattling the window. Johnny flinched, pulling Dally closer. The pale boy mumbled something incoherent as an answer to his motions.              Johnny sat up, pushing his not-as-greasy-as-before hair back. Dallas once again mumbled something in his sleep. Johnny held back a laugh once Dally swore at nothing in particular for an unintelligible reason. The dark haired boy shivered, rubbing his arms with cold. Did this monster have a heater? He turned to squint at Dallas, who seemed unaffected by the cold. The squinting did nothing.

     Waiting had no use. He couldn’t sleep. His thoughts overwhelmed him. He felt weak, really. Weak to the cold, weak to the world, weak to his thoughts, weak to his father. The pillow seemed to sink a little as he sighed. Trembling in the cold, he pressed closer to Dallas. In the pale moonlight, Johnny studied Dally closer from under his arm. The moonlight made him paler than he already was.

     It made him look young.

     It made him look innocent.

     It made him look _lovely._

 

~❀❁❀~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not posting!! I'll try to make it an every-other-week-or-so kind of thing. I hope this ending wasn't too big of a cliffhanger or too cliche.


	7. In Which Johnny Becomes Overwhelmed with Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Johnny has a panic attack oh no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE ARE HOMOPHOBIC SLURS IN THIS CHAPTER. THERE IS ALSO (as mentioned in the summary) A PANIC ATTACK, WHICH WAS MODELED AFTER MY OWN, AND A MENTION OF SUICIDE. IF ANY OF THESE TRIGGER YOU, PLEASE SKIP THIS CHAPTER.

**Johnny**

 

     I reached my dark hand out to touch Dallas’s features again. I didn't know why, but it sent a ripple of butterflies over my back. Dally stirred under my touch, grunting an’ mumbling softly. Cautiously, as though not to wake the sleepin’ beauty up, I started to traced his sharp features. High cheekbones defined by the small cut of silver moonlight, a sharp nose that cast an equally sharp shadow on his dreaming face, and lips that looked as soft as cotton.

     I pulled away, embarrassed. I’m not a faggot. I know I would never kiss a guy-- probably not a girl, either. I have to admit it-- Sylvia was a two-timin’ whore who would flirt with any guy she saw, and Sandy was pretty, sure, but she was no good. According to Pony, Sodapop was devastated. I’d rather be alone than deal with a girl like that.

     Dally stirred from his spot by me, ‘n’ I flinched. “Shut the fuck up, man,” Dal mumbled. “I ain’t no horse.”

     “Yes, Dally. I know,” I noticed my hand over Dally’s face again, lingerin’ on his lips.

     Lingering? I’ve gotta tell Pony how I used that word soon! I bet he’ll be proud of me! Pony is gonna be so excited when I tell him about the words I’ve been using to describe Dally- but I’ll say it was a pretty and Socy girl at a drive in. Pony would think I’m a dirty queer. He already thinks Soda and Steve are for each other. Gross.

     “Johnnycakes,” _Oh shit._

     “D-D-Dally?”

     “Johnnycakes, man, you do know you’re spazzin’ out and staring at me while dickin’ around with my mouth, right?” I could hear the smirk in his voice hiding disgust.

     “Dallas, I-I-”

     Could I stop being such a moron for once? My vision was going fuzzy, my heart was pounding in my head. What would he think of me? I can’t be queer. I just can’t! It’s disgusting and- and- I need to calm down. I could see Dallas’ expression had changed, but it didn’t look any better. I’m weak and useless. Weak and useless and _stupid._ What was that thing Sodapop told me to try whenever I felt the world under me waiting for my fall? What was it? Dallas, oh, Dally please don’t look at me like that- I promise I can be better…

 _“Five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, an’ one thing you can taste. It’s called groundin’,”_ Soda’s silky voice murmured into my muted ear, his gentle and kind face smiling down at me. I can see Dallas, his mussed hair falling over his icy eyes. I can see the moonlight hitting the sheets we were sittin’ on. I can touch those sheets, maybe the wall-- th’ cold might help me. The window might be colder, and maybe Dallas could keep me from fallin’. I hear Soda’s voice, my heart racin’ and empty breaths echoing through my chest. I can smell Dallas’ shirt on me, the old fabric softener and the musty smell of my greasy hair. What can I taste?

_What can I taste?_

     The world went black, the ground stopping its rockin. I could feel something new now. Something rough, something with a familiar smell, and a less familiar gasp.

     I found something I could taste, but not something good. That’s a lie. It was good. It tasted like Cherry Cola and cigarettes.

     I force myself off, panting, feeling my face burn.

                 I can’t believe I did that. I just kissed Dallas Winston.

                                            “I’m sorry,” I tried to say.

“I love you,” I choked out instead.

Why haven’t I killed myself yet? 

 

~❀❁❀~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whew! finally another chapter, right?

**Author's Note:**

> constructive criticism is appreciated :)


End file.
